A few nights ago, my nine-year-old daughter broke down in tears. She was struggling with a school teacher known for being incredibly strict. The mere thought of this teacher’s class fills my daughter with dread, and it has driven her to tears multiple times.
As a parent, my heart broke. Instinctively, I wanted to shield her from the hurt. At the same time, I knew it was my duty to help her uncover the inner strength needed to navigate stressful situations.
As I held her and tried to comfort her, something she said stopped me in my tracks:
“Why can’t my teacher be like Teacher W from preschool? Teacher W was so nice, you know… sometimes in school, I just wanted to go to Teacher W and give her a hug because… she felt like family.”
Hearing that brought tears to my eyes. While I always remembered Teacher W fondly, I never fully realised the depth of the impact she had left on my daughter’s heart.
A Lifelong Anchor of Warmth
From the bottom of my heart, I was filled with gratitude. Teacher W beautifully exemplifies the famous truth: “Children will not remember what you have taught them, but they will always remember how you make them feel.“
What a massive difference that one caring educator made. Because of Teacher W, my daughter will grow up experiencing the power of warmth. Instead of believing that “all teachers are awful and scary,” she can look back and say, “Not all teachers are scary. There can be good and nice teachers too.” Teacher W had given my daughter an emotional anchor that shields her now, and maybe in the years to come. In the face of a stressful situation, we need powerful memories like this to keep our children grounded and remind them that there is also kindness in this world.
What This Means at Whistle Woods Schoolhouse
This very topic is something our team of educators reflected on during our Staff Development Day earlier. As educators in a Montessori preschool in Singapore, we often focus on curriculum delivery, lesson plans, and measurable milestones. Yet, this experience reminds us that our primary legacy is the emotional climate we create-something we always remind ourselves on every Staff Development Day. A child who feels safe will naturally open up to learning. Conversely, a child gripped by dread or anxiety will hit a cognitive wall, shutting down their ability to absorb even the best-prepared lesson.
By embodying kindness, we do more than teach; we provide children with a psychological buffer against the harsher realities they will inevitably encounter as they grow. We might not see the immediate results of this care in the preschool years. But as my daughter showed me, the warmth we give children today becomes the light that guides them tomorrow.
Warmly,
Eiling